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Ed Roman Rant Page

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Bold, Brash, Politically & Sometimes Even Grammatically Incorrect

  • Statements Guaranteed to Stimulate Your Medulla Oblongata.
  • Statements Totally Aimed at Deprogramming You From The White Bread, Corporate America Lifestyle, Which is Slowly Swallowing Up Our Real Culture.
  • Statements & Opinions That Will Surely Draw Fire & Flaming From the Diehard, Lumpen Proletariat, Traditionalist, Old Boy Network That Decides on What Your Next Guitar Purchase Will be.
  • Misdirected ignorant brand loyalty clogs the wheels of progress !!!

Updated List of Concerts in Las Vegas

Rant Title

Rant Excerpt

George Bush Resume 2008 Bush! You ignorant cretin, you have turned the USA from a major world power into a third world Country.  Today my business has shifted from 12% foreign in 2005 to 78% for the first 6 months of 2008 in The UK,  Europe, Japan, Australia & Scandinavia. People in this country can't afford to buy anything but bland white bread low cost guitars. Here in Vegas the well to do foreigners are coming into the store to the tune of 88% buying up all the cool stuff. That's great for business but I hate to see all the cool stuff leaving our country.
Famous Pro Endorsers 2008 Coming Soon
Relics  2008

I don't need the false Mojo of a beat up guitar
to convince people that I have been a a road warrior for 30 years

Harmony Central 2008 Coming Soon
Corporate Guitars 2008 Corporate Guitar Companies are ruining our industry forever. They are destroying any semblance of quality that once existed, They have taken much of the manufacturing to the Orient. It's probably already too late,  Someday soon you won't be able to buy a handmade guitar.
Asian Made Guitars  2000 Here's another one of my politically incorrect, too little too late, pain in the ass articles reminding you that you are screwing the entire American way of life by buying expensive high end products made in Asia.
Brand Loyalty   2008   

I used Hamer guitars as the whipping boy for this article.  I am a big Hamer fan myself !!!   I personally own 5 Hamer's  !!! 
It is critical that you understand the point of this article !!!

Vintage Guitars Are Not Worth It Someone posted this article on the web and sent it to me.  I have made a few comments on the article.   
Beginner Guitars  2002 If you are getting ready to buy little Johnny his first guitar, I suggest you read the page/pages below. You will probably be surprised to find out a few things.
Best in Store  2000 When I go into a store, (any kind of store), I like to see a large selection of unique items.  I like to see things that I don't know about.
Brand Loyalty Misplaced, brand loyalty is clogging up the wheels of progress. Don't fall into that trap. Don't buy a corporate guitar.
Broken Gibsons Why is it that the most expensive overpriced guitar on the planet is prone to neck breakage. It is my contention that Gibson guitars need a major update to their design.
CNC Machines A look at the pros & cons of using computer numerically controlled machines to build guitars. 
Chain Stores Guitar Center Sam Ash, Best Buy, Walmart & Costco Some people may read my rants and may assume that I was sour grapes on Superstores for self serving reasons.  I have thought about it long and hard and I have assured myself that my own agenda is truly unaffected by these stores.
Commissioned Sales People The main reason "Guitar Center" has such a high employee failure rate or turnover is probably because they have a commission system that forces people to work at minimum wage.
Corporate Guitars 2008 Corporate Guitar Companies are ruining our industry forever. They are destroying any semblance of quality that once existed, They have taken much of the manufacturing to the Orient. It's probably already too late,  Someday soon you won't be able to buy a handmade guitar.
Cost Cutting Many people wonder why large companies try to shave pennies off their costs. Especially when the product sells in the multi thousand dollar range. Most people don't grasp the reasoning behind it.
Ebony Fingerboards It really rankles me that PRS refuses to offer Ebony fingerboards. I mean what's the deal, I thought PRS was supposed to be a Premium High End Guitar?
Famous Pro Endorsers Coming Soon
Flamers Currently there are some individuals on the internet who don't agree with my opinions.  I have no problem with that. I also have no problem with profanity and flaming.
Free Country In the United States of America we are supposedly guaranteed certain inalienable rights. Simple things like  freedom of speech and freedom of expression, religion, opinions etc.
G.A.S Many of my customers have asked me about what kind of guitars I play. Currently I use my  Quicksilver  guitar when I need major tonal versatility. I am still using a headless LSR for a backup...
Ghost Builders You may be skeptical regarding some of the facts that I will be relating to you in the examples section below. It is possible that there may be a couple of errors...
Gibson Lawsuits COMING SOON
George Bush Resume
06/20/08 - Goodbye Forever George Bush: This rant talks about Dubya's Accomplishments in his career.
Bush! You ignorant cretin, you have turned the USA from a major world power into a third world Country.  Today my business has shifted from 12% foreign in 2005 to 78% for the first 6 months of 2008 in The UK,  Europe, Japan, Australia & Scandinavia. People in this country can't afford to buy anything but bland white bread low cost guitars. Here in Vegas the well to do foreigners are coming into the store to the tune of 88% buying up all the cool stuff. That's great for business but I hate to see all the cool stuff leaving our country.
Guitar Center Fixed Prices Guitar Center will no longer be offering extra discounts and deals. In fact they have raised their prices !!!! The new owners have gone to fixed prices.
Guitars Resale Value   10/09/07 This Rant Posted 10/09/07 It is about resale value and some of the hijinks that certain manufacturers try to pull on unsuspecting trusting Consumers .  NEW RANT
Glossary of Terms Due to dealer agreements and competitor complaints many companies won't allow me to print my LOW prices.
Hand Made Is a guitar really handmade if its made by 100 pairs of hands aided by several million dollars worth of machines?
Harmony Central   2008 Reviews on Harmony Central are unfairly skewed so that a
Heel from Hell - PRS Years ago PRS guitars had no heels, Today they use this big flat heel on the back of the neck. In 1995 PRS switched to this monstrosity and it has remained ever since.
Import Guitars I used to carry very few imported guitars, I personally would rather sell USA made guitars. In the downturn economy that happened in 2001 and a seeming rebirth of American pride, many of my customers refused to buy Asian imports.
Investment Guitars  09/01/08 I can help you with a purchase of an investment grade guitar!!  In fact you would be surprised to find out that many good investments are not necessarily expensive. in fact that's what makes it a good investment.
Asian Made Guitars Here's another one of my politically incorrect, too little too late, pain in the ass articles reminding you that you are screwing the entire American way of life by buying expensive high end products made in Asia.
Les Paul Broken Necks FACT: Gibson necks Always Break !!!!  On this page Ed Roman explores the reasons why that is.
Magazines It occurs to me, that if you write a book on something you are then supposedly considered an expert.  That is not necessarily true.
Mailbox etc Rip-offs  Be Careful
Mystic Mailbox, Mystic Connecticut
Always go directly to UPS or Fed Ex. Mailbox etc typically charges at least triple UPS rates, Mystic Mailboxes The winner of our overcharge of the year award.
Manny's Imagine if you will, Omar Ahmaddesman is a Turkish diplomat en route to Los Angeles Via New York City. Omar has a to change planes in New York and he has a 5 hour lay over.
Manturd Chronicles, The Enjoy this, I hope you enjoy the story as much as I enjoyed writing it. After you finish write me and tell me if you think that this guy is nothing more than a Wimpy Wussy Whining Wiseguy...
My Price Guarantee I will not be insulted if you try to negotiate or make a better deal. I realize that human nature is such that every one wants to get a good deal.  When a customer starts negotiating price, He is telling me that he is a serious buyer.
My Selling Style People have called me a good salesman,  I don't think that I am, A good salesperson can sell anything, I can only sell what I truly believe in.  So in effect I am telling you that a 17 year old kid who works in a Guitar Center or Sam Ash is actually a better salesperson than me.
Overpriced Guitars  2001 An expensive guitar would be like a JET or a Centurion or maybe an Abstract.  These are guitars that cost a lot of money. An overpriced guitar would be one that the long term cache value is added into the initial cost.   Be Very Careful Of This.
Relics  2008 Personally I don't need the false Mojo of a beat up guitar  to convince people that I have been a a road warrior for 30 years.
Prices I get numerous E-mail because I don't post all my prices,  Believe me I wish I could, it would make my life so much easier. Hell all I would have to do is wait for the checks to arrive.
School Music Teaching Programs   XXX I am available to any school public or private who wants my advice on how to set up a program for the kids to learn guitar. I will not charge anything and I will be glad to help with any recommendations for instruments, books, and general information that may be helpful.
Spend Your $$$                Stop complaining, shut up, and spend your damn money,  There has never been a better time to spend your money, There has never been a better reason to spend your money.  Money is not edible, Most money is not collectable and money does not even make good toilet paper.
Starter Guitars  
Vintage Guitars A Guaranteed Sure Fire Way To Tell The Real From The Rip-Off's. All guitars in our inventory that are sold as vintage will be approximately 25 years old or older. Ed Roman guarantees they are what we say they are.
What Customers Are Saying coming soon
Rant Page Number 2  Archived Rants  

I get at least 3 or 4 letters from people a day who ask for more rants !!! 

Rants Page 2


Hey Ed, I hope everything is nice in Nevada. Here's an interesting story I read on the internet just now. I don't think you will be surprised when you read it:
http://www.switched.com/2008/03/21/gibson-sues-rock-band-creators-wal-mart-and-other-retailers/

They are spending money suing video game makers instead of, oh I don't know, focusing on music. I don't know if you follow game stories, but this "Guitar Hero" is huge for Gibson. You have probably at least seen the fake little game controllers shaped like Les Pauls and SG's with five color coded buttons on them. You are supposed to push the buttons in the sequence in which they show-up on the screen and you have to hit them at the right time in order not to suck. Then you will be a guitar God. Why the hell don't these kids get a damn guitar and learn to play a few riffs? You have to give credit to Gibson though, by putting their name on the controller it will hugely influence a first time guitar buyer into getting one of their crappy axes. Here's the funniest story now. There are companies on the Net that actually make "custom" game controllers! Oh yeah, you can have any picture or design you want on your custom Gibson shaped game controller.

Anyway thought you would like to read an interesting story. What do you think of this Robot Guitar Gibson has? Another way to lure in newbie guitar players who don't want to learn to tune a guitar or any of that traditional stuff. Some gimmicks are great and some suck donkey balls.

Lem Smalley


Ed,

I have been reading your rants for quite a while now and I have to say that you have deprogrammed me. Thank you. I just started playing guitar and unfortunately, I didn’t find your site until after I bought my first guitar (Fender Toronado GT HH), so I have no one to blame but myself....but, I do have a question....what is everyone’s FIXATION with Les Paul guitars??? Is it Brand Loyalty? Band Sponsorships????? Shilled Magazine Articles???? Gibson paying off everyone???? Please enlighten me....sorry this isn't a YES/NO answer, I got on my own rant.

Tim Surovy
Whitehall PA 18052
 

P.S.
From the pictures I have seen, you guys do beautiful work, I am starting to save for a Baker or eventually (if I have enough before I am eventually laid off), a Quicksilver.
 


 
Mr. Roman,
Thank you for maintaining your website; great stuff! I've learned a lot about guitars and music stores since 1965 and agree wholeheartedly with most of your rants. Your focus on quality is impressive but I'm glad you sell "corporate junk" too because most people who want to learn to play will never be very good and they'll never know until they try. I know very few folks for whom Quicksilver quality would make any difference and many for whom it would not.
 
I distinctly remember being frustrated with my inability to get the sounds I was hearing on the radio from my '63 Guild S-50 JetStar and Ampeg Reverbo-Rocket. Getting a Strat and a Big Muff was a tremendous improvement but didn't help me play like Hendrix. Getting another amp and a 'Paul expanded my options but didn't help me play like Keaggy. I have acquired several other guitars since and still can't play a solo that I want to listen to.
 
I intentionally did not see the movie "Wayne's World" but have heard the line: "I'm not worthy!" well... I'm not... and neither are most people. A high school kid with a learner's permit doesn't need a new Maserati. He or she shouldn't be lied to at the music store OR the used car lot but I know from personal experience that with persistence, it is possible to find one of those black Squier Strats which can be made to play well enough to have some fun in a garage band and find out he or she hasn't got the chops to bother spending thousands on an instrument they can't play anyway.
 
You wrote yourself that unrealistic prices from the mass marketers made custom building viable. Keep the custom shop going and don't apologize for making affordable instruments available to the wannabes who fund the industry.
 
Mark

 

Hi, my name is Chris Lamb, I'm 17, and I'm an aspiring (read: starving) musician. I own several guitars and lately I have been spending a lot of time at edroman.com. I gawked and gasped at the incredible axes Mr. Roman has to offer, but after looking around a bit more, I found that the most valuable part of the site is Mr. Roman's "Rants" section. After having read many of the articles, I am beginning to think Mr. Roman is one of the few sane and intelligent  people left in the music world. My  favorite rant, "Overpriced Guitars", hits the nail directly on the head and should be in the back of every guitar player's head at all times. I must admit that even as a young player, I have made many of the mistakes mentioned in the rants, and wish I had come across Mr. Roman's words of wisdom MUCH sooner. Luckily, I started out with a Dean Baby V- a decent guitar- at a very reasonable price ($130). However, I have loads of sympathy for aspiring guitarists who make the HUGE mistakes of buying from mega-stores, or starter packs from "Music Depot." Why more people aren't aware of the scams present in the music industry is beyond me- Mr. Roman's advice is available at a mouse click and here's the best part- it's totally FREE! Thank you for imparting your wisdom to me- I am an exponentially smarter consumer for having taken the time to read your rants.

 
Sincerely,
Chris Lamb, Vacaville CA.

 

Hello Chris

Thanks for your letter, & fine compliments, I especially thank you for the sane and Intelligent compliment, But I must deny the part about being sane. It's pretty hard to keep any semblance of sanity in my life. This is an insane industry where I deal with insane people on a minute to minute basis, I am trying to stay a little sane, but often I feel I am losing the battle.   Thanks Again !!!

Ed Roman
Jan 20th 2007

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